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Friday, April 11, 2008 Op-Ed: Mike M. Dear Y'all; As we know, movies are all subtext. A movie, watched on "mute", IS the story. The visuals are the story. The dialogue and score are filler. The visuals in the trailer, poster, etc. trick the viewers into the theatre. I recently saw the trailer for the upcoming Indiana Jones movie. I looked closely. This is what I saw. 1) Hero is shown as a white "cowboy" who kills everyone in sight. Looks like they dug up Ronald Reagan/John Wayne and reanimated the corpse. He jokes that although he is ancient he still can beat and kill guys 50 years younger with little effort. Every action is cheating, tomb looting, driving to kill or screwing a chick young enough to be his great great granddaughter. 25 y.o. underpaid stunt double does all real work. Gets paid about $25 million to be in movie. 2) First batch of villains---tribal savages. These are located in South America (?) but are generic movie villain savages. They could be African, Australian aborigines, Mayans, pissed off Eskimos, Egyptians, Malaysians, etc. they are just faceless non-white hoardes. The non-whites are shown as savage bloodthirsty lunatics, running amok and killing those poor whiteys who have invaded their land and stolen their culture's most holy ancient artifacts. The fact they are trying to recover the treasure that the whitey has come and stolen is portrayed as proof they are villains and the whitey is a hero. Yeah, that makes sense. 3) Second batch of villains---Russian commies led by a killer bull dyke. Cate Blanchett is the dyke and looks so manly that in the trailer at first I thought she was a man. The premise is made for republican trolls who still think this is 1958---the "Cold War" is still ongoing, Russkies are superhuman monsters, Americans are godlike supermen, castrating dykes are in every closet, and that sums up the entire world. The Russians have a super butch lesbian as a military leader so they are depraved and evil. The fact she will dare to fight "John Wayne" over some treasure he stole shows she is just plain wicked. The tiredest premise for a movie I have ever seen in my life. Scenario summary: 1) Yay! John Wayne back from the dead! Senile but powerful, just like the U.S.!! 2) Oh no! Tribal ethnics with spears! Run, white hero, before these illegal immigrants chase you all the way to the border crossing at Tijuana! 3) Oh no! Commies and bull dykes! John Wayne's greatest fears! It's communism plus gays/lesbian/transmen in the military, what is this, San Francisco?! Run back to Texas, senile republican grandpa! I think I will skip this movie. Mike M. | Permalink 2009 RuCo, Inc.—All Rights Reserved |
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