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Monday, February 17, 2003

COLUMBUS DAY

by the time we got to columbus at 10:pm on saturday night, the city had been blanketed by 4 inches of fresh snow. i had planned on popping over to THE FULL MONTY, an all male strip joint over on north high street, but i was too zonked from traveling all day and more than a little deterred by the weather conditions. the last time i was in columbus, i was fortunate enough to witness the splendor of the man-pussy pageantry that embodies THE FULL MONTY. i’ll never forget this one dancer who was making his debut as an ass-clapper that night at the club. he was everything i had hoped to see that magical evening in “the buckeye state”. he was a little overweight, had absolutely no rhythm, and had the cutest smile on his face that sent me directly to XANADU (a place where nobody dared to go). he had that kind of raw innocence that most dancers eventually lose and then replace with faraway eyes that seem to be making out a grocery store list for when their shift is over for the night. needless to say, i gave nature boy all of my money. had i not been chaperoned, i would have asked him to join me back at my ho’-tel.

sadly, there was to be no chubby chasing on this less than 24 hour visit to columbus, a city i have grown to love. i was there to speak at a collegiate gay and lesbian conference held on the campus of OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY. in front of an audience of about a thousand beautiful kids, i blabbed/expanded on my observations from inside the trojan horse (as i am prone to call my career in drag). i talked about sex and sexuality, masculinity and femininity, love and fear, and shaving vs. waxing. i had a great time, and at times i shocked myself with what came out of my mouth. secretly, my ulterior motive is to create an army of young freethinkers to take over the world and “terrorize ya’ll’s neighborhoods”, cause this is THRILLER ‘03, baby! after questions from the audience, an impromptu autograph session and three more inches of fresh snow, we were off to the airport to return to sunny southern california. the only thing that could have made the sojourn any better was a big fat slice of cheesecake from THE FULL MONTY.

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Posted by Ru on Monday, February 17, 2003 at Monday, February 17, 2003 | Permalink

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